Tita Files
FILE #003

Subject designation

Tito Videoke

Field profile

Will not relinquish the mic. Has three go-to songs and a wireless speaker he brings to every occasion, invited or not.

Known behaviors

  • Claims the mic before the food is even served.
  • Guards one signature song that no one else is allowed to sing.
  • Announces 'last song na' roughly six times per party.

Natural habitat

Any gathering with a power outlet. If there is no outlet, he has brought a speaker that lasts eight hours on a charge.

Signature phrase, on record

“Last na!”

Case notes

His scores are non-negotiable and always in the high nineties, because he has quietly set the machine to be generous. Attempts to reclaim the mic are treated as a personal betrayal. The trick is not to fight it. Hand him the tambourine part, let him have his My Way, and the night runs smoothly. Deny him the encore and he will sulk through the entire lechon.

Engagement protocol, for field use

  1. 01Do not queue your song immediately after his. That slot is reserved for his encore.
  2. 02'Last na!' is a warning shot, not a commitment. Expect a minimum of four more.
  3. 03If you need the mic, offer a duet. It is the only recognized legal transfer of power.

Field verification

Cross-referenced files

Subjects known to associate with, oppose, or eventually become Tito Videoke.

FILE #016Tito Corny JokeSame five jokes, every single gathering, told with total confidence like it's the first time. Somehow still gets a laugh, mostly out of habit.FILE #018Tita Forever YoungRefuses to act her age in the best way. Front row at every concert, first on the dance floor, more energy than her nieces and nephews combined.FILE #021Zumba Tita7am at the barangay covered court, front row, full choreography memorized, sweatband non-negotiable. More consistent than anyone's gym membership will ever be.
Suspiciously familiar? Take the quiz and find out which File you are.